My Phone versus Jesus

This morning I was struck by the scene of me playing games on my phone, my husband engrossed in his phone, the morning news on our TV, and our dog going back and forth between the two of us asking to be petted.  I had just finished reading today’s Wake-Up call and thinking about Lent—well sort of.  What really had my attention was what word would score me the most points on Words With Friends.  I had begun thinking about the upcoming series on transformation but quickly turned to my phone instead.  Why? I love times when I am close to Jesus and see Him working in my life.  What is causing me to turn away from that?

As a physician, I frequently was encouraging my patients to change their life style so they could have a life with energy, improved body function, less medication, and longevity.  These are things people desire.  But those things require a person to transform what they do so their bodies are transformed to healthiness.  It is the same for me.  I do pretty well with my dietary restrictions and I work out once a week with a trainer.  However, I don’t do my stretches and exercises the rest of the week.  I overeat and get digestive issues from it.  And I choose to entertain myself instead of letting Jesus in to transform my soul. My excuses are the same as what I hear from others: At least I am doing something. I’m only human. That’s just who I am. I don’t feel up to it today. I’m busy with other things.  The list goes on.  Then my phone tells me I have had 5 hrs. of screen time that day.  YIKES!

So, what’s the problem?  Why do we humans resist changes that are good for us? Are we afraid, lazy, stubborn?  Psychology probably has some theories on this.  I think the answer is simple: I am choosing to be who I am regardless of the outcome.  My habits and routines are comfortable and easy.  To change, to transform who I am requires giving up some or all of that.  And our society promotes resisting change in the name of good self esteem. We frequently hear phrases like “ you are good enough,” “you are  beautiful just as you are” “be true to yourself”, “accept yourself”.  There is no need to change if these are true.

I have to confess that this applies to my life with Jesus as well.  It is easy and comfortable to stay superficial, memorize nice sounding verses, and read scripture out of routine believing that is good enough. Submitting to the transformation Jesus wants to accomplish in me means giving up that life of easy spirituality and seeking a deep, trusting, abiding relationship with Him.  It takes time, interferes with routine, and consumes energy.  The times when Jesus is closest and I am most surrendered are often intense and exhausting.  I have come to love those times, but it is impossible for me to stay there both physically and emotionally.  More often Jesus calls me to softer sweeter times to just be with Him for a few minutes of refreshment.  Those are the times I resist, choosing my phone over Jesus.  It makes no sense.  But, out of His grace and love, Jesus has provided external ways to connect with Him—a discipleship band, two women who study and meditate on scripture with me, a church with people who desire time with me, a pastor that is teaching me to see scripture in new ways, a group that meets regularly to pray.  I am so grateful for these times to be with Jesus through community .  Now if He would just take away my phone then….

Wait!            What am I thinking?!    

NOOOOOO!!!